What Andrew wants to do right now is eat an entire carton of peanut butter and chocolate ice cream. Eat? Is that what you do when you consume ice cream? Even as a kid I wondered if that was the proper term. It's somewhere between eating and drinking. By the time the ice cream gets into your throat, it's pretty much melted into liquid, and you swallow it like a milkshake. Then again, I used to really like Baskin-Robbins "Bubble Gum" ice cream, which had gumballs in it and required a good deal of energetic eating to finish. "I'm going to go drink some ice cream" also sounds wrong.

It is somewhat moot, I'm not gonna go do that now, because ice cream is one of those foods officially stricken from my diet, because it has too much sugar in it. I can also no longer drink Coke (or any of the other, lesser soft drinks), eat candy bars, suck on altoids (a mint is what caused the most recent crater in my dental landscape), or have birthday cake. In a while I'm sure I'll develop some sort of circulatory problem and have to regulate the fat in my diet, and maybe the sodium also. At this rate, I'll have a stroke and only be able to safely (eat/drink) squished broccoli for the remainder of my time here. Fortunately, I'm not a passionate gourmand, and don't really care if I can only eat nutrient paste. Such is the fickle nature of preference. Since I don't like anything, I'm invulnerable to loss! Isn't that a happy thought? Well, it would be happier if it were completely true. Anyway, it IS somewhat hot here, so I'm going to have some unsweetened calorie-free, sodium-free seltzer water.

"They should have just written 'THERE IS NOTHING IN THIS BOTTLE' on it" --Brett

Ah yes, Conversations About Nothing, with Brett & Andrew. Brett is probably the only person I speak to IN ALL CAPS, even when in person.